Finished Commercial Webspot

7Powah · Post by **7Powah** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 2:38 pm

Hey AS community! I had to put in some work, so I hadn't been around to pick some of your outstanding minds. Anyway, just wanted to share my first official work piece with you all. It's for a contest, given by a record label. Hope you like it, it's pretty good, "I Think".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6qe-jxu1gdQ

mkelley · Post by **mkelley** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 4:10 pm

Are you looking for feedback? Or is this just to share?

Feedback wise (meant to be constructive) there really isn't any animation here, just some lip sync (which, truth be told, is so-so). I could see all *kinds* of comic potential with the voice, but without any animation it's extremely dull -- not much different than the talking heads on Meet the Press (perhaps even less funny).

Remember that animation is all about movement -- just because someone is standing around talking doesn't mean they don't move. This person's voice is filled with life, but as it is they might as well be a stiff on screen.

Another rule of thumb -- when your titles are better than what they enclose, you know you have problems.

(Nice artwork for the background, though).

FCSnow · Post by **FCSnow** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 5:57 pm

mkelley wrote:

Remember that animation is all about movement -- just because someone is standing around talking doesn't mean they don't move. This person's voice is filled with life, but as it is they might as well be a stiff on screen.

It's all about body language. If you get stuck animating a talking head, then give it some body language. It will always carch the eye of the viewer, (in this case judges) and hold their interest.

Also, when I begin to animate a talking head, I begin with the eyes. They are always moving and can tell as much of the story as the lips.

FCSnow

mkelley · Post by **mkelley** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 8:34 pm

Yep, much better way to describe it -- body language.

(My old teachers used to say that even if you didn't understand the language you ought to be able to understand the animation, or at least be entertained by it, and it's amazing how this holds up when looking at good work. Indeed, the first test is to always turn the sound off and see if you "get" the story).

I like your eye comment, but I also think eyebrows alone can do an awful lot (in this case, with dark glasses, eyebrows might have been what was needed).

7Powah · Post by **7Powah** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 9:11 pm

To MKelley: Not a problem the piece is serving it's purpose that the customer wanted. Secondly, I don't take offense to your remarks, because as you stated in one of your other posts. "You lack the talent to do it yourself". Also judging from your other posts, I can see that you're a sarcastic, wish you were a genius type who likes trashing other peoples creativity to make yourself feel good, so I have some sympathy for you on that one. More body langauge could be there, but it was more of a public announcement and a taste of what his character will look like. The character being bugs bunny wasn't in the cards. The character being a cartoon of the actual person was though. There's even a poster of him in the background if you were paying attention, as well as many other elements that they wanted the public to pay attention to and not distract from them as it is only 2mins., and some change long some things were placed there to see what the public noticed. As there are somethings that they can relate to or recall seeing before somewhere. He moves and expresses subtle body langauge, in the face too. And also he picks up a flyer and a cd for your viewing pleasure while saying the message he was meant to say. However I guess you'd rather see him grabbing his crotch since he's a rap artist. Anyway he'll be riding motorcycles and driving cars and whatnot in he's animated music video. As to your question it's a share, and if someone like yourself doesn't like it, then you don't. "Cause one man's trash, is another man's treasure".

I've seen constructive criticism in these forums and your little nasty comments are not the it, trust me! Oh but thanks for the compliment on the backgrounds and intro/outro you made my day.

@ FCSnow- Maybe some of this answers your post. And by the way I wasn't stuck on a talking head. He's wearing sunglasses by the way which do move and make expressions but seldon, he even flexes his eyebrows and such. I've seen some of your work. "Cute", and I'll leave that at that.

mkelley · Post by **mkelley** » Mon Nov 12, 2007 10:28 pm

Wow, man, you have *got* to cut down on your coffee.

I was only offering some advice -- while I definitely lack drawing talent I also made a living in directing and creating television, so it's not like I lack other kinds of talents (and part of my job was indeed evaluating young talent and giving them pointers which they took much better than you -- some of them have gone on to do work you probably even know about).

But it's okay -- if you never want to hear anything negative about your work there is an easy out: just don't put it out there. I promise you no one will ever say anything about it then (and I, for one, will never comment or ever see anything you ever do again -- that's a pretty safe bet :>)

7Powah · Post by **7Powah** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 12:09 am

I guess attention to detail isn't a strong point. I believe I stated if you don't like it then you don't, along with a few other things. Also just because you might have directed whatever, if so doesn't make it good. Directors of crap like JACKASS weren't good directors just good con men who convinced the ignorant that they were. If you don't like my answer then don't post dude! You made a statement, I made a statement. Oh by the way. I'm successful too, just like you, ain't that nice.

Please share with me what kind of car you got too. That'll help. Don't throw stones if you live in a glass house.

slowtiger · Post by **slowtiger** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 10:47 am

oh boy .... if you react like this at just a statement like "There isn't that much animation in it", I don't even want to imagine how you will react to detailed criticism.

At second thought, I wouldn't be interested much. There are many other people willing to learn and improve.

7Powah · Post by **7Powah** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 1:16 pm

Well slowtiger, it's like this. To me, all I stated was there are better ways to constructively criticize, and it's also how you say something sometimes as well. Just like you feel all he said was it needs more animation, but that's not all he said, that's just your interpretation. He stated a bit more and took pot shots on top. He didn't really offer something helpful like what one might have done he just ragged on it, and he can't even do it. That's my point. Now you're co-signing for him like he offered me the Holy grail or something in his statement. I don't mind criticism that has something to offer other than wise cracks trying to be little ones work. How about, "Hey I think you should've or could've maybe done this or that". Maybe added this or that and do it like this as oppose to "Your titles are better then the toon, it's less funny then this probably worse. That's not constructive that's insulting! Especially coming from someone who can't draw to boot. But I guess I'm the evil guy in this conversation. And simply put you don't know me well enough to know what I wish to learn, or if I can't take CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. If you don't want a answer to what you post then don't post. But don't think you can just sit and take shots and not get an answer. Verstehen Sie oder nicht?

slowtiger · Post by **slowtiger** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 1:27 pm

Q.E.D.

7Powah · Post by **7Powah** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 1:43 pm

I guess I'm uneducated, because I don't understand the Q.E.D term. Why not educate me please. Or is it a negative remark?

Genete · Post by **Genete** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 2:04 pm

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Q.E.D.

7Powah · Post by **7Powah** » Tue Nov 13, 2007 2:42 pm

Thanks Genete.

@slowtiger- CUTE

unkledunkle · Post by **unkledunkle** » Fri Nov 21, 2008 1:33 am

I like the car in the background. Is that a 3D object?

Aside from all the negativity going on here. I'd like to make a constructive criticism. This is an animation and there is movement here. The character is well made and designed but when he turns his head from side to side between time :20 and :25 his hat seems to stay in place and gives the impression of a rubbereyness of the head. I would say if you're gonna change anything start there.

Seriously though. Good job.

synthsin75 · Post by **synthsin75** » Fri Nov 21, 2008 2:03 am

I can't believe I managed to miss that fun and exciting thread.

7Powah,
You seem to like being a victim so I figured I'd let ya know that I agree 100% with MKelley. Very spot on critique. Watch a variety of animation and notice how the composition is much more dynamic. More camera cuts, exagerated motion, variety of angles, etc.

Feel free to rant at me now with a paragraph.